Q: Hey! I’ve got a tricky situation. Just to preface, it takes a lot for me to drop someone so that’s not an option here. I have two friends, Ay and Bee. Bee and I have had the same class schedule without planning, so we’ve become good friends. Ay and I became friends through Bee, but I formed my own really good friends with her too. Ay and Bee had some problems, and are no longer friends (Ay is very hurt by Bee’s actions). Bee has also messed up kinda big for me, but I am still a friend of hers. Anyways, how do I stay friends with both, without making Ay uncomfortable and/or Bee sad or left out?
On a lighter note, how can I manage to find time for self-care (showers, teeth brushing, etc) with such a busy exam and class schedule?
A: Hey there! This does indeed sound like a tricky situation. But every problem has a solution! I propose an idea: how about you voice out how you feel to both Ay and Bee? It seems like Bee has been quite salty to you as well, so maybe let them know that this is the situation and try to have them make amends. I know there’s no way to ensure that this will occur without any awkwardness, but if this friendship is worth salvaging, then in a couple of months this will be nothing but a laughing matter. As for your relationship with Ay, you don’t need to compromise how you treat them because of her fallout with Bee. While they may have introduced Ay to you, you shouldn’t feel obligated to take Bee’s side.
On the note about self-care: while grades are very important, that is no excuse to forego your personal hygiene dude! I know it’s difficult, but your health comes first and you could potentially jeopardize it if you don’t take care of yourself properly. Not making time for hygiene and self-care will only make your stress and busy schedule worse, so you’re not helping anyone by putting it off in favour of homework. I know this probably sounds repetitive, but create a schedule of what time you want to do each activity. Exam stress is next level, but please give yourself time to just relax and breathe for a bit. Meditation usually helps me personally, so you could try that too!
Hope this helps!